All things.
June 18th, 2009
This is exactly how I feel right now. I want to curl up and not come out until everything feels better.
Summer starts on Sunday and I am very, very excited about it! The Summer Solstice happens and even though we’re not Druids, I still get all excited about it all.
I’ve been feeling a bit miserable for a couple of reasons. I’ll type them out below and then turn them into positives. Everything negative always has an upside too. [:
1. The woman who tail-gated us home just so she could swear at us because she was drunk/stoned.
2. Being told that Nathan’s surprise birthday present was only dispatched today and as there is a postal strike tomorrow, God knows when I’ll see it.
3. Feeling like I’m getting no where with my art and that all my inspiration has been zapped away.
4. The annoying French man who lives with us, me ending up cleaning up his dishes and him just leaving more out for me to clean. He can forget it.
5. iTunes taking for bloody ever downloading Pet Shop Boys’ new song.
And now the positives:
1. She was obviously out of order. Even a woman walking past when she was screaming told me to ignore her as she was obviously mental.
2. I guess it can always be a belated present, and it really is the thought that counts. I sent a polite email to the man to let him know I wasn’t happy with the situation so let’s see what he can do about it. Fingers crossed.
3. I always get those feelings. I just need to wait for another creative burst to come along.
4. We’re moving out in a few weeks anyway, and he’s hopeless anyway. A 23 year old who doesn’t know how to clean or cook food? Pretty pathetic.
5. The wait is worth it!
I feel a lot better after all that crap. I’m mostly gutted about number 2 as I paid for it on Monday so it would get here in time, but the man was too lazy to send it to me. I’m fed up with all the postal strikes. I think they’re all totally selfish. They get paid a good £3ok a year which is nothing to complain about, especially in a recession. They’re not the only ones struggling, but you don’t see hospital staff striking, do you?
I keep dreaming during the day. I’ll be doing the dishes and dream off into some foreign land. I keep wondering where we’ll be next year. I keep thinking of 10 years time, if we’ll have a nice house by then, if we’ll go on exotic holidays together and if we’ll still find life fun.
I washed the car this morning when a lady whizzed by me in an electric wheelchair. She was smiling away and looked really happy about something. I watched her whizz off down the pavement when I heard a man laughing from behind me. It was an elderly man also in an electronic wheelchair who was obviously racing her. He zoomed by, cackling his head off and having the time of his life, even if he was 80. It made me smile so much and realise that only our bodies get old, not our spirits.
I’m off now to go and make one of Nathan’s birthday presents. I think it is something he’s wanted for a long, long time. Or at least I hope so!